The home is a fragile, vulnerable space, and it's always difficult to open it up to strangers, or even some family. It's all fine and dandy if someone wants to mess up their own house, but when hosting, it's a whole different story. It's paramount to use the most careful discretion when letting someone into the home. But sometimes, circumstances arrive when a stranger or derelict family member may have to enter. Read on to hear about the incredibly rude things that guests have done in these people's houses!
I See You Brought Your Dogs
“My coworker had this big get-together and invited about 20 people from our office. We had this one chick, about 33 at the time, who was just a little…off. Only child, very selfish, didn’t play well with others or do anything outside work except Crossfit and try to push pyramid schemes on us.
She decided it was a good idea to bring her 4 horribly-behaved huskies with her to this relatively big party. They’re jumping all over everyone and just generally being a nuisance. So the host asks her to please put them inside. She agrees and puts them in the bathroom. An hour or so later, they go check on the dogs. They’ve torn up the baseboards of the sink, tried clawing through the door and even the wooden base wall paneling. Of course there was poop and pee everywhere as well. The host is exasperated, but this chick is just like, ‘Yeah, they do that sometimes. Oh well, I’m gonna head out.’ It was awkward because the host (her supervisor at work) really felt like she should pay for it, but the odd chick was like, ‘You’re the one who invited me.’
‘Yeah, you, not you and your dogs…’ So glad I wasn’t her supervisor..”
Hammered People Don’t Sneak Well
“One of my wife’s close friends (at the time) tried to sleep with me. She and my wife were passed out in the guest room. She tried to walk upstairs to the master bedroom in the middle of the night but I was still in the living room with friends and we watched her start walking upstairs and asked if we could help her get some water. Now, people who are slammed don’t sneak well, and I’m happily married and wouldn’t have gone for it anyway. We figured she was just confused, but she started stammering about how she was looking for my wife (who was sleeping in the bed this woman had crawled out of) and then started (badly) pretending to be sleepwalking. She knew our house well and was clearly alert until she realized there were still people awake and started pretending otherwise.
Months later, she admitted what was going on in texts to me where she continued trying to get me to respond to flirting. I showed my wife and between that and some other stuff, they ended their friendship. I think she was just sad about her own marriage and jealous of my wife’s and that I personally had nothing to do with it. This happened years ago. Now, it’s just a funny story.”
Rowdy Parents
“One year for Christmas, despite multiple text messages sent out to her that day saying dinner was at 5:30, my mother and father showed up 2 hours late, completely tanked. They ate their cold dinner, then started complaining about how I run Christmas in my house. They started throwing presents at everyone demanding we open them in rapid succession which really wrecked the sentiments for everyone. They also made a slurred speech together about how they were so glad they lived to see Christmas with us (?) and how they worked really hard to make the whole gathering happen…you know, in MY house on MY dime.
They drank more even when we tried to hide the drinks. When mom threw up on my carpet and blamed my cooking. I was frustrated. When she started telling my one sister and her boyfriend that they ‘needed’ children because she ‘needed’ grandchildren so she was going to poke holes in their protection was the last straw for my husband and I. They were made to leave shortly after.”
In Laws
“My mother in law would wreck anything nice. I know it was intentional because it would defy logic and she’d do things in my home that she’d never do in hers. I had a million coasters, she refused to use any of them. She was the Coaster Queen at her home. She threw wet towels over my new shower curtain to dry, instead of on one of the million towel hooks in the bathroom and back of the guest room door. She’d walk across my kitchen to grab my fancy, embroidered DECORATIVE white kitchen towels to mop up black coffee and chocolate frosting…instead of the paper towels 3 inches from the mess. Or dish towels 5 inches away. She reorganized my kitchen and told me my way was ‘wrong.’ Mother in law and father in law never flushed the toilet and smoked and drank black coffee the whole time; I loved waking up to that smell and floating coffee craps in the toilet. She told me my battenberg lace duvet cover was too fancy, then made sure she hooked a toe in it and tore it wide open so I couldn’t repair it. It had to be deliberate. Don’t even get me started on how she just had to tell me how to improve every single from-scratch item I baked and cooked instead of thanking me or complimenting me.
My husband and I lived several states away, so I only had to deal with very infrequent visits. It was a fairly manageable situation and my husband did not understand that she was messing with me and I love him, so I didn’t need to create drama. I personally think she was trying to push my buttons, so I ignored it and acted like it all went over my head. She’s been gone for almost 4 years now–during her last Christmas, we knew it was going to be her last. She usually hosted Christmas, but wasn’t up to cooking, so I cooked/prepped a good bit of the meal, transported it several hours, finished the meal there, and she came home from church to Christmas dinner and her son home for Christmas.
She just cried and thanked me and didn’t criticize a single thing. I like to think we were good at the end.”
Just Go In The Sink
“My mother and her husband had been going through a ruff patch financially, and didn’t have power or water at their house so my girlfriend and I (even though I didn’t really get along with my family) decided out of sympathy to allow them to stay a few nights at our house. Everyone is getting along, and everything is fine. We are making dinner for everyone when I hear my mother arguing with her husband because she was using the bathroom and he had to go at the same time and was complaining about having to wait. We lived in a redneck town and the yard was pretty secluded so any other guy in that situation would have just went outside to pee, instead this guy opens the bathroom door and proceeds to pee in my bathroom sink. I find out when my mother comes out the bathroom irritated with him and I ask what is going on, she tells me. I understandably am disgusted by this and tell him he has to leave. My mother surprisingly takes his side, and I end up having to tell them both to leave.
Needless to say I didn’t allow them back in my home for quite some time after that.”
The Entitled Photographer
“I invited a friend to stay with my ex fiancee and I in NYC.
I hadn’t seen this guy in years but heard he was a photographer out of luck and in need of money (we knew each other since childhood and hung out while in college). So I fly him out and let him stay at our place for four days in exchange for engagement pictures.
The first day, he gets blind hammered and pukes in my shower and doesn’t clean up. He also packed a bag of dirty clothes and strewn his stuff all over our living room.
The second night, we have a work event and he tags along. He proceeds to hit on this girl, at first successful then he crosses over to creeper zone and tries to convince her to do it with him in the office bathroom.
He then comes to me and asks for my keys for my apartment so he can do her….mind you, he was sleeping on our couch.
I refused and he gets angry.
We leave and he arrives at our house at 4 am. He somehow snuck in behind another tenant…who then proceeds to call the cops because…well, he snuck in. I had to tell the cops he was a friend and all was good.
That night, he mentions he needs a shower because he hasn’t jacked off in three days.
Next day, he was supposed to photograph us…but he was too hung over. He then proceeds to yell abuse at a food vendor because he was selling halal food when his food cart had an American flag/eagle motif. I part ways with him at that point and tell him he needs to pack his stuff and leave my apartment. He disappears into the city, leaving his dirty clothes in our house. Two days later and a day after his flight was supposed to leave, he shows up at my place.
He asks for his clothes, I give it to him. I ask him how is he going to fly home since he missed his flight. He apparently thought his flight was that day, not the day before.
He then asks me for money to fly home. I refuse. He asks to at least use our bathroom. He ends up taking a dump and leaving his wallet on my bathroom counter. He calls me from JFK to bring him his wallet. I refuse.
He then says, ‘Well, eff you! I jazzed all over your shower and on your couch!'”
Use Your Manners
“I watched a former friend of mine open my fridge, drink straight from the orange juice carton and put it back like nothing happened, proceed to do the same to a brand new jug of milk, and then sneeze into his hands and without washing them open a brand new bag of chips and grab a crunchy handful of them like some kind of freaking animal.
In less than a minute, he ruined half a carton of OJ, a brand new gallon of milk, and a brand new bag of chips…
After all of that, when I confronted him about it, seeing as how he did it right in front of me, he acted like it was a perfectly normal and sane thing to do.
Needless to say, he is no longer welcome in my home. That’s far from the only reason he’s no longer welcome but that was the last straw. Don’t mess with my food.”
Public Bareness
“When my husband and I first got married and bought our house, we rented a room to his cousin. It was ok at first but then his cousin (B from here onward) started seeing a girl. In the first week of their dating, they began leaving used rubbers on the floor of the hall bathroom and in the doorway to his bedroom. On another occasion, I had come home to fine that this girl (R) had taken my clean wet clothes and dried laundry from the washer and dryer and put them all in a pile on the floor. She had also left the freezer door standing open and defrosted half of its contents. At one point, she even pretended to be me when my mother called my landline. It was unclear why she did any of this, it was really clear that she couldn’t be trusted in my house alone. Besides, we really didn’t know anything about her besides that she was dating B.
I had gone to get groceries and rushed home to unload and put away what I’d bought because my husband was on his way and we were going to go out to eat. As I put my key in the deadbolt, I heard what sounded like the television. I was concerned because I distinctly remembered turning it off before I left and I had been the only person there. I stuck my head inside to check out what was happening and I saw R on my couch butt bare with a towel wrapped in her wet hair. She didn’t have anything covering her and she was shaving her ‘downstairs,’ spread eagle while watching Jerry Springer. The bad thing is, she didn’t even look shocked to see me and barely spared me a glance as I carried my arm load of groceries to the kitchen with a horror-stricken, shocked stare.
I didn’t even know what to say to her. I was angry, embarrassed, shocked and a dozen other negative emotions. After getting all of the freezer stuff put away in the most awkward 2 minutes I’ve ever experienced before or since that moment, I made a beeline for the door to leave. I did turn and demand that she leave and never come back and demanded she tell B the same thing, because if I saw them again, I’d probably end up in jail. I went to my in laws and waited until my neighbor called and told me she had saw her leave. Then I went home, put on rubber gloves and gathered all of his stuff from his room and piled it on the front porch.
My cousin and I didn’t speak for a while, but eventually, years later, he came around and apologized.”
Give Me Some Food
“I grew up in a very affluent town, but my family was pretty middle class as only my mom could work full time (dad was on disability retirement). In any case, my parents are very accommodating people, they would go out of their way to make people feel welcome in their home as long as they were respectful. If you were rude, you’d be gone but it took a lot to get tossed, so much so I’ve only seen it happen twice and both times to the same kid.
One of my ‘friends’ from elementary school would regularly show up at my house around dinner time, fix himself a plate, eat, take some for the road, and then leave. This happened about 5-10 times in any given month. I always thought it was odd as he had a stable home life and frankly I wanted him to just go away but my mom felt bad about telling this kid to scram.
Until one day, this kid comes down to our house and does his usual shtick. This time was different though, as my mom was finally growing tired of this because when he had come over to play (keep in mind we were still friends in a sense) he was rude, did not respect some of our rules (don’t be wasteful with food, respect our property, etc. basically don’t be an idiot), would throw empty juice boxes and wrappers on the ground on his way home, and the dinner trips were starting to happen more often, grinding on her. She described it as, ‘why do I need to feed somebody else kid?’ So she asks him, ‘X, why are you always coming here around this time? Doesn’t your mom or dad cook?’
And this kid looks here dead in the eyes and says ‘Yeah, she does but sometimes she’s too tired and tells me to come to your house to eat.’ Then, he reaches and takes a handful of waffle fries off of my mom’s plate, and that was the straw that broke the camels back.
My mom, whom is willing to put up with a lot of poop and not say boo, gives this kid the business for LITERALLY TAKING FOOD OFF HER PLATE LIKE IT’S HALLOWEEN CANDY. She tells him very firmly to stop coming by here for a free meal and when he take things for the way home (juice boxes, packs of cookies, other snacks) to stop throwing them in the street.
The kid protests, saying he doesn’t litter and doesn’t see what he did wrong just now. Well, that’s it, now my dad is telling him he better leave and my mom is fighting back the urge to tear this kid a new one. Finally, the kid turns and leaves, and my mom was a mix of enraged and in shock for the rest of the night.
Eventually, my mom would ask X’s mom about the thing and she denied ever sending him to us for meals, but I think that’s a lie.”
Avoid Hosting Bachelorette Partiers
“My grand father had always been a sharp dresser. I’d often complement him on his suits, cravats, furs, hand carved walking sticks, and occasionally he’d lend me a tie or maybe a pair of shoes for a special occasion, or let me borrow his car if I had a date.
When he died he left his wardrobe to me as we’re more or less the same height and build. I wouldn’t wear the clothes often, but occasionally I’d wear one of his suits or an old coat, and I always got a buzz out of it.
A few years back my sister was getting married her bridesmaids came to stay in our family house the night before the wedding. When I got home from a long drive my sister explained that the bridesmaids were going to be staying in my room that night. I was happy for them to do so and I checked into to a local hotel to give them all some space.
I head up to my room just to grab a suit for the big day and I can already hear them screeching. It’s not like I’ve got too much to hide but i’m not super comfortable with the thought of strangers in my room.
I open the door and the first thing I see is the three of them jumping up and down on my bed. The I realize they’re all wearing my grandad’s clothes. Suits, pijama robes, the lot. One of them is even wearing his glasses and she’s spilled vino all down the front of his coffee linen suit.
I look around and I even notice they’ve rifled through my drawers and found old love letters from when I was a teenager.
As soon as they saw my face they knew what they were doing was completely wrongs. All I could manage was the word ‘holy…’ before I slammed the door.
I never told my sister as I didn’t want to kick up a stink, but when I saw that awful woman with his glasses on I honestly could have thrown her through the wall.”
Give The Bathroom 5
“A friend of a friend was over for a get-together on New Years Eve. He proceeded to take a huge dump in our toilet. I’m fine with the dump, but apparently this guy had some sort of an obsession thing where he needed latex gloves to wipe his butt (he would literally live life with latex gloves in his pocket in case he had to poop). So guy takes his huge dump, loads the toilet with toilet paper, tops it off with several pairs of latex gloves, then for some reason thinks it’s funny to add shampoo and one of my daughter’s Barbie type dolls in there too (guess my daughter left it in there from playing earlier that night with her friends). The toilet proceeds to clog (obviously) and floods the bathroom and entryway with water. We call the plumbers during ’emergency hours’ to fix the issue since its like 1 am on New Years and the plumber has to bring out the super snake machine (plumber told me it’s been years since he used it). He snakes it and sees the doll covered in gloves and looks at me like ‘what the heck man.’ $700 later, the problem is fixed. All the while this guy is laughing under his breath, but won’t admit to it. Doesn’t offer to pay or help or anything. Two months later, his girlfriend (who he admitted it to) calls me and apologizes because she couldn’t take the guilt anymore.
That guy was the worst. I usually like everybody, but that guy is on my list (literally and figuratively) forever.”
Never Host When Drinking’s Involved
“I invited a friend over for drinks and BOY did she drink.
She got so sloshed that she vomited on my living room wall, all up my staircase, on my bathroom floor, and fell down in it. She looked like she had rolled around in chicken salad. After I made her shower and gave her some of my clothes to wear (she was still smashed), she stole my flip-flops when I wasn’t looking and went RUNNING out of my house to go to her boyfriend’s apartment. I had to go follow after her and she got detained for public disorderliness. Not to mention that she tried to come onto me while she was out of it (with vomit on her). I rejected her, and she later tried insinuating that I had been creepy.
I have not invited her over since.”
Stepmothers in Law
“I kicked my ex husband’s stepmom out of my house. She came to stay for a ‘few days,’ uninvited. I got home from work, expecting to find the house empty. Nope. She had my living room looking like a shanty town. The next morning, she complained about EVERYTHING. She had the nerve to refer to biracial individuals as mixed breeds. She invited herself along on our date night and then expected us to pay for her. She used the N word in public and then when I got angry about it, said it was fine because: ‘it’s what they call each other.’
During her EIGHT DAY UNINVITED VISIT, I steamed the entire time. The 7th day, I had a biopsy (they thought I might have cervical cancer). I cracked. I screamed, ‘When are you leaving?!’ Rude, I know, but I was stressed to the max and in a lot of pain from the procedure. I kicked her out on day 8 since the ex had no balls. She’s a HORRIBLE person. That’s my rudest house guest ever. Though she was not a guest per se.”
Boyfriends Are The Worst
“My sister and I used to be roommates. She was dating this total prick, and he came over one night while I was there…and this is how I learned he was a prick. Fun side note: this is how I met him.
He comes in and doesn’t introduce himself or even look at me for the longest time. Didn’t even say hi when I said it to him. A few minutes in he finally starts to talk a bit, then a lot, then proceeds to dominate the conversation to the point I gave up trying to even participate. I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he was nervous or socially awkward, but after the third or fourth time he talked over me like I wasn’t there, I gave up.
He decides he wants to show us a video on YouTube. He goes to my computer and starts booting it up (didn’t ask my permission, just helped himself). Then he decides to roughly grab my monitor. The stand was a little wobbly if you weren’t familiar with it and he nearly broke it as he manhandled it and blurts out, ‘Holy moly! I didn’t realize this thing was such a piece of garbage!’
At that point, I got mad and said, ‘Do you usually come over to people’s houses and call their belongings crummy or am I special because you’re dating my sister?’
His genius reply was, ‘Well… I mean, I’ve been here before.’ And then proceeds to hunt down the video.
Okay then.
We did not get along.”
Smokes In The House
“I had a roommate once who brought a bunch of people over and one chick lit a smoke in our living room. This prompted several more to do so as well. Nobody who lived at our place smoked. I came out of my room and asked them to smoke outside. They got really mouthy about it, but I shot my roommate a look that he understood and ushered them outside.
I went back to bed thinking it was over. But almost as I was pulling the covers back over myself, I smelled smoke again. They had just gone into the garage which was right off our kitchen and had the door open with people going in and out of the kitchen for drinks.
My other roommate by this point was out of bed and irate at the noise and I heard him storm past my room. I followed him into the kitchen and into the garage where he just freaking lit into these people about how big of pricks they all were and this was our home and they were disrespecting it. They tried to play it off that they were in the garage and it wasn’t a big deal. The roommate who invited them over was no where to be seen (we found out later he was hooking up with some chick and he let her smoke in his room which set off our fire alarms at 4 am).
Well my other angry roommate lost his mind and literally grabbed the pack of smokes sitting on our dryer, ran to our kitchen and shoved them down the garbage disposal. They got the hint and left.
Forget those people and forget the roommate who invited them over. We kicked his butt out a few months later over a series of issues.”